Andrew Like-Slettuce (apocalypselater) wrote in dave_barry,
Andrew Like-Slettuce

Happy Thanksgiving!

You know how scientists claim that global warming is causing the oceans to rise, and if something isn't done, eventually North America will be covered by water as far inland as Mason City, Iowa, the result being that -- among other disasters -- the nations entire pig population could be stung to death by jellyfish? Well, what if the real problem is NOT that the oceans are rising? What if, in fact, the continents are sinking under the weight of fruitcakes, which are the densest objects on earth, other than professional wrestling fans?
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